Updates, Thoughts, & Confessions
Let me start by saying it was hard for me to write this blog post. I try to keep my posts on the optimistic/humorous side of neutral, but I'd be just another fake chump hiding behind an artificial internet persona if I showered this post with glitter and smiles. December was the toughest month I've had in years. Millions of people had it rough and are still struggling, and while I mentally handled 2020 very well at first, something happened toward the end of the year that dismantled my mood, and it only got worse. I still don't know exactly what caused this avalanche of depression (maybe it was just cumulative stress and anger over everything), but it hit me the hardest in the weeks leading up to Christmas.
Still, hope is not lost! My life doesn't actually suck. I'm surrounded by the most caring and loving family and friends I could ever ask for. I've been coaching myself out of the blues, and it's the realest talk I've ever had with myself. The bottom line of these self-talks is acknowledging I had lost sight of myself, had given into stress and insecurity, and completely backpedaled on the life-changing mindset I had adopted exactly 5 years ago in late December 2015. These 5 years have been the most rewarding and most hardworking years of my life, and I don't want it to go to waste by being a grumpy curmudgeon.
This isn't going to be a self-help, motivational post, and I won't go into the details of my hardships and insecurities, but it's a New Year, and obligatory "new year, new me" monologues are hip and groovy. More seriously, I need to throw this out there to give me more incentive to stick to my word and hold myself accountable. The struggles are far from over, and I have books to write, so I best chin-up and forge on.
The Integrity of the Super Club, Volume 2.
I spent the whole month editing this sequel to my goofball romantic comedy. It's taking me longer than expected, and not just because I was down in the dumps, which certainly didn't help. There was a LOT more work to do on it than I planned for. Instead of sweeping up typos and making basic improvements, I've been doing heavier edits. Not quite a rewrite, but pretty close with all the rearranging, deleting, splicing, and dicing I did. I think it'll pay off, though, because it's leagues better now than what it was. Hard to believe I considered the rough draft to be passable as the beta version...
I had the full manuscript edited just after Christmas, and I'm at the end of the second editing round now. I expect to do at least one more quick lookover before it's done to check for flow and maybe catch some lingering typos (and the status information graphics at the end of each chapter require so much work that it makes checkbook balancing fun). Regardless, I'll need to wait for all of the artwork before I can do the final formatting and graphics. I still can't give a marginally accurate date yet, but I have full confidence The Integrity of the Super Club, Volume 2 will be published in the first half of this year, possibly in the first quarter if I'm lucky.
Oh, and I received the concept sketch for the front cover art, and it's going to be incredible, so keep an eye out for the cover reveal soon!
That book I wrote with a friend.
My collaboration story is still in the hands of our beta/sensitivity reader. They have their own writing and life to deal with first, so I'm not rushing them, and that means the progress on this is speculative. I did tell the reader I want to publish it this year, and if things go accordingly, that will be the case. It'll still need one more round of editing when I get the manuscript back, and I have some cool ideas for the formatting. (When I say "cool ideas," I mean "time-consuming experiments.")
ANNO DOMINI ~Allium~ is still on hiatus.
Yep, sure is. I had plans to start writing Book 3 this year, but since I'm in the midst of figuring out life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, I really don't know. The majority of my heart isn't willing to cancel this series at the moment, but I've come to grips with the fact that I may need to delay it more, and if I do drop the series completely...then, that's life.
It was my debut into original English light novels, though. Because of that, I want to raise it, put it through college, and have it support me when I'm old and haggard, or at least be something I can feel proud of. Hard work and genuine positivity will get me there, so I'm not giving up on it without a fight.
I'd love to make music again. Part of the reason why I have this fancy, powerful computer now is to handle my composing and whatever process-heavy art projects I do. But, as I've said, the road ahead is looking to be quite different than anticipated, so I have nothing more to say on this right now.
This is the first official announcement that I'm working on one. That's all you get for now.
Looking to the future and stuff.
The beginning of a new year is exciting and terrifying. I don't know what will happen, and considering all of the choices I now need to make quickly, my writing and creative endeavors are moving down my priority list. 2020 was my most prolific year, and I still have hopes 2021 will be equal to or greater than that prolificity. No matter what, I'm going to be very busy this year, and my mental health will be the most important key to what I do, how I do it, and how I handle the outcomes. I don't expect it to be easy, but it will certainly be crucial.